tamponblog

First a funny (or "disturbing") story: My 3 year old son seems to think that his penis has healing properties. He saw I had a cut on my foot, so straddled it, pressed his penis against the injury and said, "pfweep, pfweep! Owie all gone!" He proceeded to check the rest of my body for "owies" as I was trying to explain I didn't want him sticking his penis all over me.

OK. Back to the actual task -- as I go into labor sometime in the next few days, my thoughts are naturally occupied with stuff relating to that whole process. I remember through my first pregnancy being bombarded with suggestions on what to do after the birth as a healing, nurturing act - many of these included things to do with the placenta: some families plant a tree with it. (Bet you could nurture a tree with menstrual blood, for those who use The Keeper and other methods that would enable collection of the blood.) Others create art. Then some eat or drink it. I remember babbling about this right after I gave birth to my son. My doctor was amused. I later read in a birthing manual how the new mom is supposed to become really talkative right after the delivery of the placenta. I laughed when I realized I had indeed spouted all kinds of information - and it was all about the placenta! I really hope I can keep quiet this time around. ;-)

I didn't do anything fancy with my placenta; it was discarded as is typical hospital procedure. However, the one thing that I wish I could have changed about hospital procedure was the disposal of the cord blood. All throughout my first pregnancy, I looked up various banks and saw that all were insanely priced. No matter, I thought. I figured I'd at least have it collected and donated to a public bank. I didn't necessarily want the blood for my child - rather, I just wanted the valuable stem cells to be available to someone. But even donating cord blood to public banks takes big bucks. The retrieval kit is expensive. Then there is the matter of whether the hospital is willing to retrieve the blood. I can guarantee you that had I brought a cord retrieval kit, the hospital wouldn't have used it in the flurry of activity that surrounded the birth of my child. I would have been out A LOT of money. The retrieval process is actually quite quick and easy, and it is a real shame that it isn't simply done automatically and the blood banked publicly. It could really help medical research. Sigh. (The irony is that the hospital where I delivered is the teaching hospital for an Ivy League medical school that includes top scientific researchers - but their actual hospital procedures do not match this and I found my care there abysmal.)

Snopes.com on dioxins in tampons.

In the July/August 2004 Utne, (sorry, no free online edition) there's an article about ecologically sound feminine products. "Your pantry shelves are brimming with organic, fair-trade, shade-grown, and free-range food. You opt for recycled paper and biodegradable detergent. But lurking beneath your bathroom sink is a pile of crinkly, pink, elaborately packaged menstrual supplies. You're not alone: Many women continue to use disposable tampons and pads, despite the ecoconsciousness that governs the rest of their purchases." The article discusses various feminine products that aren't bleached (dioxin paranoia), aren't cotton (pesticide-intensive agriculture), aren't disposable, and/or aren't absorbant (TSS concerns). It talks about that reusable cup that you rinse out, sea sponges, and cloth pads like our grandmothers'. They also discuss a few radical groups of women, like Bloodsisters and the Tampaction Campaign.

Now, I've always been a little suspicious of the paranoia about dioxins, especially since until this I'd only heard panic about them in these stupid alarmist e-mail forwards about asbestos in tampons that invariably linked to some company's non-bleached tampons. If the FDA and the EPA both say that the amount of dioxin in a tampon is safe, am I going to decide that they're wrong based on the word of people who can't cite studies, and who call tampax the great evil? The Tampaction web site's guide book includes a photo of some unused feminine products in the dirt, as though they're illustrating the used feminine products filling up landfills. The also put a picture of some unnammed industrial smoke stack next to a paragraph about the chemicals in tampons. Evocative clip art, or irresponsible pseudo-illustration aimed at those who are too naive to read critically?

I'm totally on board with reducing the amount of garbage that goes into landfills, with supporting small businesses over mega-corporations, and with using products whose manufacturing does minimal harm to the environment. However, the ecologically sound menstruation lobby has completely turned me off by linking these legitimate complaints with unsubstantiated claims and radical rhetoric. Am I wrong here? Can the tampax corporation buy whatever study results they want, leaving the grassroots organizers no way to ensure unbiased scientific answers? Is the FDA really in the pocket of Johnson & Johnson? Am I a bad liberal because I have trouble taking seriously women who advocate the natural experience of using no feminine products at all? Think about the environmental impact of all that extra laundry!

Coincidentally, in the same issue: "Blogging Off," an essay about how the authors' friends' blogs ruined her life. It was reprinted from this essay in the Village Voice.

not-so-fresh's post about Foundation Garments reminded me of this one night when I was drinking some beers around a campfire, and some of us ladies went off in the woods to pee, and two of them decided to see who could pee farther. One, I think her name was Elise, had this particular technique which involves reaching down to the ground behind you (like that cheesy dance move) and then, on all fours, you can create quite an impressive trajectory. So these two women had a pee-off.
No, I didn't participate... I had stage fright.

Anyone else have a tale of stunt-peeing?

I can't seem to find Clairol's ReNewal shampoo anymore, and I really liked it. Anyone really happy with their shampoo, please comment and try to talk me into your product. I have long, generally straight hair that tends to frizz a bit in the heat. I'm looking for a product that would strengthen more than de-frizz, though.
I'm happy with my conditioner: Pantene Smooth and Sleek.

Call it "shapewear," call it a "body briefer," call it a "foundation garment." A girdle by any other name is still uncomfortable. And if it's not uncomfortable, it's probably not very effective.

I needed something new for my summer of weddings, in one of which I'm wearing an a-line bridesmaid's dress that's cut on the bias. (Translation: cling cling cling!) I needed something that would smooth out my rolls a bit (and a regular bra would create them, as would regular underwear, in the waist and saddlebag region). I found this, which I thought would be great, because the legs would continue the smoothing right past my two hip bumps, and not create a big roll right where shapewear usually ends mid-hip. HOWEVER, I neglected to think about the powdering my nose factor.

With the ones that end mid-hip, there's usually a crotch that has three bra-style hooks. Very challenging to operate when the "shapewear" is nice and snug, but usable. I didn't think through what it would mean to have the thing go down to near my knees, and I ordered three different styles online rather than trying them on in the store. Some have a crazy contraption where there's a hole in the outfit that's covered over by the regular snappy closure, but the one that I liked best ended up having a split crotch. yikes!

I recently wore the thing in public for the first time, and for my four bathroom trips (I even purposefully dehydrated myself a bit, but what can you do?) I just wasn't brave enough to attempt to pee through the split crotch. What if I missed or splattered a bit? How could I sit through a wedding reception if I smelled like pee? And how could I rinse out an accident and dry the thing in the bathroom with no hot air hand dryers? So, four times I completely stripped and redressed. This was extra difficult because I had a zipper in back that was hard to get myself, and I had little tiny ribbon straps with snaps sewn into the top to go around the bra straps, so that everything would stay in place. I had to work those darn snaps so many times! I never timed how long my bathroom trips took, but I wonder if anyone wondered about me. And I missed the groom's dance with his mother.

Obviously, I need to practice with this garment, but who wants to put on such a difficult to get into piece of clothing to go pee? Of course, if it is possible for me to reliably pee without having to strip, that would sure make my life easier the next time I have to wear it.

At 8pm last Friday (the Friday of Memorial Day Weekend, let us remember!), my husband took a call on our home line from a web client of mine. (I was sleeping; I am pregnant and very tired!) How did the client get my home number? I dunno.

It is bad enough that he phoned that late after "business hours" on a Friday. (And to my home number, no less.)

And it is bad enough that he phoned on a Friday before a three day weekend.

But even worse is that he saw me two days prior and saw that I am super-pregnant.

So why does he chose this particular weekend to pick up the rather large web project he abandoned in July of 2003?

When I see a very pregnant woman, I figure she is no longer working so that she can get ready for the birth, be "accessible" in case labor comes early, and so forth. I probably wouldn't think to suddenly call her to do a bunch of web work for me (unless he thinks he'd better get it done now before I give birth - even so, that shows the difference in perspective!)

Other Priorities Come To Mind.

UPDATE: I emailed the guy yesterday with the information I needed from him to complete his request. (I had waited until yesterday since that was the first "business day" after Memorial Day Weekend.) Sure enough, in his response this morning, instead of just giving me content for the one page that is empty (which he didn't give, incidentally), he lists changes for a bunch of other stuff. And based on the history of this particular site, he will then have more stuff to change once the first batch is done. At some point, he's going to get an email from my husband saying, "Um. My wife is in the hospital having a baby, so she can't do that next set of changes!"

My free Ditties arrived! (Have yours, NSF?)

The free sample arrived along with a shiny plastic version of the "Dittie Diary: Pt 1," some stickers, and a note from the founder encouraging the whole "pass it on."

Really, amazing marketing. Almost makes me eager to try 'em out...